


Take that Rex!

by IconicAnemone



Category: Fellswap (Fandom), Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gamer me, M/M, No Plot, No Smut, Paps is friend, Self-Insert, fellswap, probably going to be a slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2021-02-07 15:54:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21460612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IconicAnemone/pseuds/IconicAnemone
Summary: Fresh out of college, what does a young lady do?Sit on her butt and play games with her monster gamer friend.But when she meets him IRL?That's when life gets interesting.
Relationships: Alphys/Undyne (Undertale), Duff/Rolf, Me&Papyrus, Me/Sans
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For people waiting for my Werebones Swap fic.  
I decided that I'm not going to keep going on that.  
I was trying to do it one way, and it wasn't working.  
Trying this fic a different way, so I might actually be motivated to keep going.
> 
> Self insert cause Izza me!

"take that motherfucker!"

"Language, Rex."

"you usually aren't this strict with other games." He says through the speakers.

"I chose this game to get away from all of what your saying," I say as I smash a few buttons on my controller. "And on second thoughts, I should have just not played with you."

"but you love me, anne omnisity."

"But I love you," I sighed as shot a guy. "Got one!"

"time's almost out." 

"The world is almost played."

"GAME OVER!" We both shout as the words flashed on my screen.  
  
"Did we win did we win?" I asked, crossing my fingers.  
  
The results are shown in screen and I flip back. "NOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

"looks like we lost." Rex said from his own bedroom.

"Point oh one percent! We would have won if we covered just a little more turf!" I said as Splatoons asked if I wanted to keep playing.

"i would say we could try again, but,"

"Yeah, you have to get up tomorrow."

"try today."

I looked over at the clock on the wall. "I've been up later."

"so you've said."

"Not my fault I lived in a single room with my whole family! And two dogs!"

"yet that was years ago."

"Whatever. I'm logging off. See you tomorrow night?"

"i have something to do then. how about thursday?"

"Oooh, I've got a shift then. Friday I'm free."

"got it. see you then iconic."

"I won't!" I said before shutting down the chat. I smile as I turn off the TV and stand up. I stand up to stretch my back, raising my hands above my head. I shake my hands as I start getting ready for bed.

Gamer Mutt019 was a real gem that I found over two years ago. We chatted for a while, but it took a couple of months before I started voice chatting with him. Splatoons was just one of the many games we played, all of them either competitive or two player. Heck, I was even beating him at Hay Day! Hadn't started over for one year longer then Rex was above ground.

Yeah. Rex was a monster. Hadn't told what kind though. Didn't push it. I didn't tell him how I looked. Except for the fact that I wore a hat all day, every day, 24/7.

Life was fine. Had a good gaming partner, job was reeling in money, communication with my family was good. I was content.

That wouldn't stop the bad parts though.

As I took off my jewelry. (Watch, scrunchy, and necklace into the hat) I thought about the anti monster raid that happened two streets down from where I worked. Did I join? Oh no! I'm fact, I still had a bruise from telling one of those guys to shove off from trying to trash the windows. Just cause it was pro monster doesn't mean you can break the law.

Stupid racist. 

I brushed my hair as my mind went back to Rex. What did I know about him. Just cause I was careful what I shared with a (not so) stranger, didn't mean he didn't share the same thought line.

Besides that he was a monster, he had a older brother, and loved to draw. Loved to drink BBQ sauce, and especially loved to tick is brother off. Was a lazy bum, but still looked 'as hot as you can get them'.

Oh, he was also flirty.

I presumed that he lived in Ebott, but I could be wrong, due to some monsters spreading out. There were some in home town Alabama last time I called home.

Course, that was a country away from where I lived. Putting on some PJs, I looked out the window for a sec. An apartment view awaited me. Due to finishing school last semester, I didn't have time, (or money) to move out of my apartment into the suburbs. This was the best place for my out of house budget as I started college. Was saving up for somewhere quieter, but for a country girl, that was the suburbs or out of town.

I took off my glasses, and set them by my radio, grabbing the eye mask right there. I quickly turned off the lights and climbed into bed, turning on the radio to a nonprofit radio station. I quickly got comfortable under the covers, and went to sleep.

But for me, that's staying away daydreaming till I fell asleep.

But, that's just me.


	2. Rolf's and Duff's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ally goes to work

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to say, I have no plot planned for this. Just the simple stuff.

_DING DING!_

"Hi! Welcome to Rolf and Duff's, how may I help you?"

"Can I have a secret shake?"

"One secret shake, coming right up!" I say as I turn to the shake machine and quickly grab a cup to put some of three different flavors into the cup. Mint, chocolate, and pineapple.

I then take a scoop of whip cream from our store made supply and plopped a spoonful on the top of the cup. I bring it out in front as I sat a cherry ontop. "One secret shake! 1.12!"

The man who ordered the treat gave me a two dollar bill as he took the cup. "Keep the change!" He said as he left.

I smiled as I put the money in the cash register and took out 88 cents to slip in my belt pouch.

Two best friends, Rolf and Duff, asked me to work here when they first opened. How was I to say no? A job, free ice cream, and I get to see my favorite gay men every work day!

Speaking of them, "Hey Cat?"

"Yeah Duff?"

"You wanna take a lunch break in the back? Felix can cover you."

"Sure!" I said as I started heading back. Today was slow, so I could count on our favorite slacker to man the front desk.

Or cat the front desk, I thought as I passed Felix on the way to the back room. Rolf thought he was so funny hiring a cat monster when he called me Cat.

"Pretend to care about being there?" I asked the taby monster cat as he stood by the register.

"Sure Ally. Go on." He said, leaning on the counter. I rolled my eyes as I turned to the owners.

They currently weren't working, but Rolf and Duff spent blood and tears to open a place where they could run their own ice cream shop. And anyone who tried it always claimed truthfully that is was the best.

"Sit down, Alleycat." Rolf said, patting a seat at the table back here. "Duff bought some from that food truck, Grillby's."

"You found that again?" I asked as I quickly say down and grabbed the bag in front of the man of the hour. 

"Sis phoned in a tip that he parked it by the park with the lake." Duff said, on his phone. Brown hair and dark skin, most people could say he was good looking. But you loved his laid back attitude most.

"Isn't that Callahan Park?" I asked before taking a bite from the burger I took out. Way better than McDonald's. Especially the way it disappeared on the way down.

"That's the one." He said before reaching in the bag to grab a fry. 

"How'd Captain Crunch find it?" Rolf asked. Bright blond hair and bright blue eyes, this man always tried to turn a name into an obnoxious nickname. I got mine cause I loved cats. And my name was Ally. 

"Kelly's coworker told her." Kelly lived and breathed the law, being one of the good ones that wasn't racist. She worked as a cop, but always loved a good time. She got her nickname from an early age, back when she was still a teen and still watched Veggie tales. I have to admit, the older movies are good, but her favorite was 'The pirates who won't do anything.' Take a guess people.

"Tell her that I say thanks, and to give my thanks to the coworker." I said , taking another bite. So good!

"Will do, Cat."

We sit there in silence as I finish my burg. Rubbing my hands on a paper towel, I stand up. "I'll let Felix off duty. See ya."

"Bye Alleycat." Rolf said as Duff raised a hand. I smile as I walk into the front room.

The smile quickly fades as I see an older lady yelling at the monster. I don't know what she was saying, I wasn't paying attention. "Is there a problem here?"

"Yes!" The lady said. "I am severely allergic to cats, and this monster is right here!"

"I wasn't talking to you mam. What's going on, Felix."

"Just another person complaining about me." He said off handedly. If you didn't know him, you would think he didn't care, but I knew him. I saw the slight twitches of his tail, which he could only partly control.

"Mam," I said, turning to the lady. "Our employee is in obvious sight from outside. If you were paranoid about your allergy, you should not have come in."

"But I wanted ice cream!" She said, reminding me of a spoiled brat.

"Yes. But given the fact that Felix here is a monster, and therefore produces no alergins, it should be safe for you to stand in here and wait for him to prepare your order."

The lady swelled up like Violet from Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory. "Let me talk to your manager!"

"I am the manager." I said truthfully. "I can call one of the owners of you want."

"Yes, do." She huffed. huffed

I held in a sigh as I opened the door to the back room. "Which one of you want to talk to this lady fussing at Felix for being a monster? "

"I'll do it!" Rolf said, jumping up. He walked out of the back room with a confident smirk on his face.

"Are you the owner?" The lady asked.

"Yes I am. Are you harassing my employee? Yes, yes you are." He leaned on the counter. "Why'd you want ice cream?"

"Cause I fucking deserve it!" She said, causing Rolf to inhale sharply.

"Hey Cat. Want to get the swear jar?" He asked me. I smiled and nodded, and went to get a random jar. We didn't really have one, but I'd rather see a jerk lady pay for cussing.

As I came back after putting my earlier 88 cents in it, the lady was already ranting at Rolf about something. Felix had already moved on to a customer who came in when you were in the back, but you didn't pay attention to them, deciding to watch the attraction.

"--and when I -- Are you even listening to me young man!" She asked, cutting her rant off.

"Nope!" Your friend said cheerfully. "But I could get my husband's sister to come listen to you."

"OH! You're GAY!" the lady screeched. "You're literally FUCKING GAY!"

"You have a problem with that?" Rolf asked, not have changed the smirk he came in with.

"I DO have a FUCKING PROBLEM with that!" The lady just wouldn't stop. "You and you're husband can go to FUCKING HELL!"

"Oh no," Rolf said, clicking his tounge. "You just crossed a line. You can tell at me all you want, but."

He stood his full height, a foot above the lady, and leaned over. "No one insults **my** boy."

He then slouched again and leaned on the counter. He waved a hand. "You may go." 

The lady swelled again, but instead of yelling, she stomped out of there. 

"WHOO WHOOP! Go Rolfy!" I said, throwing my hand in the air for a high five.

"That lady had it coming." He laughed.

"she sure did." Said a ravely voice. I turned to the customer who came in earlier and finally paid attention to them. He (?) was a monster skeleton, about Rolf's height, but slouching like my friend. He was wearing a unzipped hoodie with a dark purple shirt underneath. He apparently was in a lot of fights, (what monster wasn't?) and had lost a tooth, specifically a canine replaced with a golden fang. His eyes- or eyelights were pinpricks of purple, slightly lighter than his shirt.

"Did you get your order?" I asked as Rolf went to the back room.

"felix is almost done with it." He said, right before the cat brought over a bowl of ice cream.

"The 'normal' usual." Felix said, sliding it to the skeleton. "3.91."

"Usual?" I asked. "You come here when I'm not?"

"No. Papyrus came to my cream cart underground." Felix said. "He just hadn't found this place yet."

"ma usual usual is a custom flavor." Papyrus said, giving me a wink. 

"Well just text our shop number, and we'll make a batch for you!" I said. That was one of the awesome things about Rolf's and Duff's. Someone once ordered a batch of mexican flavor ice cream. Dunno how Duff figured that out.

"just might." Papyrus said, paying for his order. "how bout I just text you?"

"Pass." I said. "Enjoy your ice cream!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good old Rolf and Duff. Complete OCs, and I love them. 
> 
> If you didn't know it, Felix is SF!Burgerpants. Lady is a jerk.
> 
> Didn't exactly plan on Paps showing up. But I don't plan these things


	3. Streams and Spiders

Seven o'clock. I logged onto my computer at home and pulled up some links. Checked up on YouTube and Tumblr. Looks like there's a new pokémon game coming out. That's cool.

I notice an article talking about new rights for monsters. Sighing, I clicked it. Don't like politics that much, but I felt like it was my responsibility to keep up with monster laws and rights.

Looking at the pictures of the article, I study the queen. Toriel was a large goat monster, and could be very intimidating. I didn't see that though. I saw a good strong leader for people who needed it. 

My eyes flicked around the background of the picture. There was that guard. A skeleton monster who always looked alert. If he didn't move at all, I could think he was just a prop he was that good. But I remember seeing him shift on television, so I know he's real.

Seeing the guard reminded me of the Papyrus who came into the ice cream shop earlier today. Didn't wasn't to be racist, but I wondered if they were related. Not too big of a stretch. Felix's boyfriend Brian, a bunny monster who worked for Napstatan, claimed that he was related to all bunny monsters in some way. Of course, it could just be a bunny subspecies thing.

I chuckled. A straight ace lady working with three male lesbians. Who woulda thought.

A text came through Facebook messenger. Oh cool! My brother Josh, gamer name X, was streaming on YouTube. I quickly got into the video site and clicked on his stream, joining a thousand watchers watch X do a play through of a new Star Wars game.

In the chat, some of the people were saying rude things to my bro after he made an off handed comment about monsters.

  
Pokeman01: _'they should just go back where they came from' _

TrueJedi: _'neck right!'_

TrueJedi: _'heck**'_

  
I sighed before typing a response.

  
IconicAnemone: _'don't talk like that here. X doesn't like politics.'_

  
Some of the other viewers chimed in, agreeing with me. One of them caught my eye.

  
DeterminationEpic: _'politics are for debates and social media. not gamer streams.'_

DeterminationEpic: _'unless their into that.'_

  
You smile as Josh eventually caught sight of what was going on in the chat. "Shoutout to my sister Iconic, who made herself known in the chat. Hey little sis."

I scrunched my nose annoyed.

  
IconicAnemone: _'hey big but younger bro'_

  
A couple of lols erupted from the chat, while Pokeman01 said something about how monsters should drop dead.

"If you don't stop that Pokeman01, I'll have to ban you." Josh said as he turned back to his game. Long and shaggy hair the same color as mine, (very light brown, almost blond) he could claim we were twins. He even did once, and everyone believed him. I laughed at the memory, remembering how lazy he was. Didn't even take his dog out unless Bear practically jumped on him. 

Looking in the background, I spot the German shepherd laying just in camera range. I smile at all the memories. Rip his adoptive brother JJ.

I watched as my brother responded to some of the kids in the chat. How did I know those watchers were kids? Josh actually met them at vid con last year. Next one is right around the corner. Might want to plan going.

I opened a separate tab for YouTube and started playing its music mix. I love to listen to music, and my tastes hadn't changed for years. Favs were still country, oldies, gospel, pop, rock, and game music. Throw some miscellaneous in there like some movie songs and violin, (specificity Lindsy Stirling) and you got music that would cast me asleep.

Sometimes. YouTube might throw in a song that I couldn't help but sing along. Didn't happen often anymore. Drilled those songs into my head enough that I can turn them into white noise, and then start singing at the drop of a hat.

I look back at the chat as a Fall out Boy song started playing. Looks like TrueJedi was back at it, joined by Temmie. 

  
TrueJedi: _'what kind of abomonation is nice to monsters '_

Temmie:_ 'the kind who would like to be killed '_

Temmie: _'ever dusted a monster before?'_

Nope. That had to stop. I quickly grabbed my phone and called Josh. He would understand. Typing in the chat would take too long due to X needing to pay attention.

The phone on his end started to ring. "Just a minute guys." He said, pausing the game. He picked up his phone, and answered. "Hey sis. You could have just typed in the chat to talk you know."

"Yes." I answered, with a slight echo, due to Josh having it on speaker on his end. "But user Temmie was talking about monsters dusting, and TrueJedi was encouraging it."

"Ah." He stole a glance at the camera. "You guys need to stop or I will be banning you."

Couple of people in the chat were reprimanding the two people. DeterminationEpic caught your attention again.

"DeterminationEpic says that they know Temmie, and that their dad is fussing at them. That's good."

Josh chuckled. "You mind staying on speaker with that background music so this can be a real 'featuring Iconic thing'?" 

"Sure why not?" I say. "We can get a real voice chat going so I don't waist any more minutes."

"Here that guys!" Josh says. "Little sis is going to provide commentary as I play."

"Big sis to you," I say as I start the voice chat, hanging up.

The rest of the stream went off without a hitch. No more people came up in the chat that needed to be banned, and I kept egging X on when he made a mistake, causing him to yell so hard in frustration that Bear looked up from the floor.

All in all, not a bad night!

That is, until the spider.

Don't get me wrong, spiders haven't freaked me out in years. That was a weird transition. I went from, 'Spider?! Bigger than a dime!? Run! Far far away!' To 'Spider? Meh, scorpions are worse.' Only reason I kept smushing them was cause my mom had arachnaphobia, and I stopped completely after I moved out.

But don't blame me when I started when I saw that there was a palm sized spider on my bed with a folded card.

I huffed. "Won't Muff ever text me?"

The spider wiggled in a way that ment no and lifted the card to give to me

I took it and unfolded it, sitting on the bed next to the spider.

_'Dear,'_ It started. _"You haven't come by to the cafe in a while. Drop by tomorrow? Also the little messenger is Omphy. ~Muffet"_

I shake my head and look down at the spider next to me. Omphy was one of five spiders who interacted with me the most, and I kinda grew fond of them, to the delight of Muff. I place my hand down palm up to give Omphy a lift to the kitchen counter, to which they complied instantly.

After dropping them off at the counter, I pulled out a thing of apple juice. Each of the spiders had a drink that I gave them whenever they visited. Good thing Grister wasn't the one that came today. Fresh out of lemonade.

I brought out a small and shallow bowl to pour the juice in, and slid it to Omphy. "Not a bar tender like Muff, but there you go!"

They bobbed in delight, and scurried to drink the juice. I have yet to figure it out yet. Seemed rude to just wiki it.

I notice that they wrote something on the note pad I always had on my counter, in that small, but large for its size hand writing that Omphy had. 

_'Yoka and their batch died yesterday. Muff probably wants you to have one of their confections.'_ It read.

I blinked back a tear I didn't see forming. Looks like five went down to four. I pulled out a cup a poured myself a glass of purple coolaid. They didn't come by often, but you could see how I reacted. The drink was Yoka's fav.

"To Yoka and their batch." I said lifting the glass in Omphy's direction. "May their dust make others happy in baking."

After I finished the cup, (never not fully drink a toasted cup. Bad luck folks) I smiled at Omphy. "I'll probably swing by sometime tomorrow. See you then?"

They nodded, and then scurried off. Was never sure how they got from Muffet's to my place and back so quickly and safely.

After that, I got to bed, eyes still moist from tears. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't except the visit with Omphy. Didn't even plan it at all.
> 
> Josh is based off my brother, as well as Bear and JJ being based off of our current dogs.
> 
> JJ is alive and kicking, but this is years into the future, (as in, the monsters surfaced right now, or before the new year) so of course things have changed.
> 
> Also, who can guess who DeterminationEpic and Temmie are?


	4. Talk talk talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What! An update that's not a new fic! More likely than you think!

I bounce my leg as I fiddle with my phone, not really doing anything on it. I look up to see the TV in the waiting room playing something on HGTV. Love it or List it, the later seasons. Eh, I prefer the original people.

"Mss Pete?" A nurse calls for me. I stand up and walk into the check-up room. After getting checked up on, yada yada, the doctor comes in.

"Hello Ally." Dr. Doug said, coming in. "Just a regular check up?"

"Yep!" I said. "No needles this time."

We both laugh at that. Damn my needle phobia.

"Are your joints acting up?" He asks.

"Nope. Been walking everyday."

"That's good," he marked something down on his clipboard. Due to my weak knees, I had arthritis symptoms if I didn't take a week or more long break from regular exercise, aka walking or biking everywhere.

We talked some more, about the possibility of flu vaccine, ect. He then sat back.

He smiled. "Well, we're about finished. We just need to wrap it up and you can head home." 

"Nah, more like to Muffet's." I said smiling. 

He chuckled. "That's my daughter's favorite place. They have good coffee."

"Eh, not one for caffeine myself." I replied.

After signing out, I hopped into my car and drove downtown.

I grimaced as the road turned into bricks, downtown being older. Apparently it had 'history charm'. Bleh. It just made it a lot harder to drive on in the winter, due to the snow plow being half an inch above the road.

I pulled into a toll parking lot after paying the toll man, and walked out onto the sidewalk.

Nice day out. Sun was shining with just a thin layer of wispy clouds. My hat was blocking most of the rays, but I spotted a street performer playing bagpipes squinting in the sun. I stopped by and dropped a dollar bill into a bin he had, and he did a little Scottish bow or whatever in his kilt. I would say curtsy, but he was a guy, and curtsying was a 'girl' thing.

Damn stereotypes.

Eventually I made my way in front of a brick building with a wooden sign, sporting the words 'Muffet's Cafe' in a swirly purple font. In the window was lighter purple drapes, with a slight covering of spider silk making it shimmer.

I walked in, the bell jingling as the door swung open. 

Good ole Muffet's. Didn't know all those years ago that going to a spider themed cafe to ease my still nervousness of spiders, would lead me to gaining a good friend, even if I didn't accept a discount from Muff.

"Fufufu," the spider lady said from behind the counter. "You've finally made it!"

"Yeah yeah I did." I said as I sat down at a seat in front of her. "Finish the customers, I can wait."

Muffet chuckled, and turned to a hand monster who was talking to her before I came in.

A black widow I recognized as Dercim crawled up to me, and I held up two fingers, signifying how many of my regulars I wanted.

I looked around, trailing my eyes among some of the people there. Some of them were regulars that I could recognise from my not often visits. There were the bunny guards. And there was that nice old lady. And there was that skeleton.

Skeleton? I did a second glance. Yep, it was that skeleton from yesterday. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was stalking me. No reason for him though, so I just shrugged it off.

Dercim came back over with a lemon poppy seed muffin, and two chocolate chip muffins. I thanked them as I took a chunk off a chip muffin and popped it into my mouth.

Muffet finished with her customer and came over. "Glad you could make it, dear."

"Well, you reminded me." I said, swallowing. "But still."

"A loss of a friend is always sad," The spider lady said, nodding.

"Exactly."

“Anyway,” I clapped my hands, rubbing them slightly. “What confection did they get baked into?”

She chuckled, pulling out a plate with a slice of cake. 

Strawberry cake.

I blinked. “Strawberry?” I asked..

“Yep.” She said, putting two elbows on the counter and placing her head in her hands

I look at it and try to keep a straight face as I took the fork Muffet was giving me. I then start eating the slice. Oh, I don’t know why, but real fruit in pastries have always been unappetizing to me. The only fruit that I like somewhat has always been apples. Strawberry? I repreased a shudder as I swallowed the first bite and dug in for another. Sure, my tongue might be complaining, but this was Yoka’s pastry. I would suck it up and finish it completely. 

Muffet chuckled as I made a face after finishing it off. “Enjoy it?” She slid a glass of water my way.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d expect that you chose strawberry just to spite me.” I said, taking a gulp of water.

“Yoka and a couple of others did request that they get used in a strawberry confection.”

“Agh!” I threw my hands up, remembering the snarky spider. “They get me even after death!”

We both chuckled at that. 

I spent a while after that, just chatting with Muffet. Catching up, finishing my food, and all that.

After a while I looked at my watch, noticing the time.

"Well, I'll be off." I told Muffet, depositing some bills on the counter as I slid off my chair. "See you soon?"

"Not too long till your next visit, okay?" She said, waving me off.

I waved her off as I slipped out the door.

Once I got to the ice cream parlor, I pushed into the back door and entered the break room. I greet Duff, who was working at his ice cream machine. I then go into the bathroom to put on my job shirt, before coming out to the front counter, where there was a slight line, and Rolf manning the counter.

I stood in front of the other cash register and started taking orders. After a while Felix dropped in and took Rolf's place so he could go in the back to help his husband.

Looking up after plopping some cash in the register, I saw that there was only one more customer left. It was the skeleton from yesterday.

"Hello, welcome back to Rolf and Duff's! How may I help you?"

"weren't you at muffet's earlier?" 

"Careful there." I said, jokingly. "Someone might think you're a stalker with that kind of talk."

"heh." The skeleton huffed, putting an elbow on the counter. "Well I kinda was sitting outside till the rush died down after i got here."

"Again. Stalker~!"

"yeah, yeah," he waved his hand. "i got a text earlier today that my custom flavor was done."

"Alrighty! Name and flavor?"

"what, did you forget my name?" 

"In fact, I did. No offense."

"eh, none taken. Papyrus and bbq. two scoops."

"Really?" I said. "Stay right here. I'll get it."

I quickly went to the back room. "Where'd you put the BBQ Ice cream?"

"Right here." Rolf said, kicking a sealed bucket my way. I picked it up and brought it out, where Papyrus was still standing.

"Sorry for the wait." I said as I set the bucket with the others. "You know, I have an internet friend who likes BBQ." I commented as I got a bowl and a scoop.

"huh," He said as I spooned some out. "they wouldn't by any chance call you aspirin energy by any chance."

"Funny," I smiled. "That's exactly what they call me, Rex."

his grin turned into a real smile. "well looky there."

"Hey!" Duff said from the door to the back room. "No flirting with Cat while she's on duty."

"He's not." I tell him. "He's just my gamer buddy."

"Alright." He replied. "You do you."

I turned back to Papyrus as I slid his bowl to him. "3.12."

"can I get a number with that?" He asks again, more direct than last time.

"Since you're you, sure." I said, holding my hand out gesturing 'gimmie'.

He handed me the exact change, as well as his phone, already ready to receive a contact.

I quickly pop the pay into the register before plugging in my number and a name into his contacts before handing it over.

"see ya around, 'an enemy'." He said, reading off his contacts.

"Good job!" I said, resting my chin on my hands. "You said it right."

Rex's eye sockets widened as I burst into laughter, then soon joined me with some chuckles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was torture! When I realized that I didn't need to have Ally and Muffet have a topic for small talk? Pure Bliss!


	5. Meeting the Lesbians

The next couple of days, Papyrus had been texting me inbetween our gaming sessions. Mainly memes and such, but also random stuff.

  
  


Rex Boy:  _ my bro is fussing at me for sleeping in again. _

Me:  _ how old are you, ten? _

Rex Boy:  _ close. eleven _

Me:  _ I'm really hoping you're kidding. _

Rex Boy:  _ i am. 21. how old r u? _

Me:  _ don't you know anything? You never ask a lady's age! _

Rex Boy:  _ sorry mam _

Me:  _ is that sarcasm? I can't tell, sorry. _

Rex Boy:  _ it is. _

Me:  _ how old's your brother? _

Rex Boy:  _ five years older. _

Me:  _ got it _

  
  


I smiled as I pocketed my phone and pushed my cart. I had run out of food. Again. I was never going to get used to doing stuff on my own. 

I opened the door from the freezer aisle and grabbed a packet of burritos, before turning and accidentally hitting someone.

"I am so sorry!" I apologized as I backed off, giving them space. "I didn't see you there!"

"It's alright" they said, the light from their glasses flashing in my eyes. "Though those burritos aren't the best in flavor."

I held up the bag and smiled. "Unfortunately for me, I'll only eat the purple bag!"

I then made a fool out of myself and started to pretend to start eating the bag. "Mmm, delicious!"

The fish lady stared for a second , before bursting into laughter. "Fuhuhuhu! You dumbass!"

Smiling, I nodded at the package in her blue webbed hands. "I'm guessing it's a little fishy for you to be buying sushi."

_ Okay, I'm ready to die now. Lord, take my spirit away before I do anything else. _

She kept laughing, bending over a little, holding her stomach. "What is up with you?"

"Dunno," I said, laughing, "the sky?"

We then stood there for a couple of minutes laughing.

By the time we caught our breaths, we had already traded names. 

"You know, I don't know why I was acting like that, Undyne." I said, smiling. "Not sorry, but still."

"It's alright." She said. "It was fun laughing like that. Though I don't know how my girlfriend didn't hear me and come over."

"Who said I didn't?" Said a rougher voice. Turning around I spotted a buff looking yellow dinosaur with scratches on her left eye. "Who's this?"

"Hi!" I introduced myself, holding out my hand. "I'm Alley. I'm a stranger who bumped into your awesome girlfriend randomly and then made a fool out of myself."

"I could hear that, punk," She said, grabbing my hand and shaking it firmly. "Nice to meet you. I'm Alphys."

"Sweet!" I said, giving her a smile. "And I hope you didn't miss the part where I called your girlfriend awesome."

"Oh I didn't," she said, sliding up to the blue scaled lady and grabbed her, nuzzling into Undyne's neck.

"Alphys!" She giggled, leaning into the dino.

My smile grew as I finally tossed my bag of burritos into my cart. "I got to head back to shopping, love birds."

"Oh!" Undyne said, slipping out of Alphys' grip. "We should trade numbers!"

"Sounds good to me." I replied, already unlocking my phone so she could put in her number. I took her phone from her hand and plugged in my number before handing it back. "Alphys. You can get my number from Undyne if you want to."

"Gotcha punk!" She said, giving me a thumbs up. I nodded, and then pushed my cart away, heading to the dairy area.

As I was checking out, my phone dinged.

  
  


Unknown Number:  _ Heya punk!  _

Unknown Number:  _ It's Alphys.  _

Unknown Number:  _ Dyne's girlfriend. _

Me:  _ Hey Al!  _

Me:  _ Contact saved. _

Dino Punk:  _ Good! _

Dino Punk:  _ You want to hang out sometime? _

Me:  _ I play video games. _

Dino Punk:  _ That'll be awesome. _

Dino Punk:  _ I'll get Dyne's friend to hook me up. _

Me:  _ 5pm? _

Dino Punk:  _ Let's do it! _

  
  
  


By the end of that conversation, I was already walking towards my apartment. Smiling, I slung some of my bags onto my other arm so I could pocket my phone.

I walked, casually, and calmly, enjoying the atmosphere.

There was a dog barking down the street. Some kids were screaming in laughter. Someone was watering some flowers near his window. A cat was balancing on a rail a few feet away. Some squirrels were fighting by the oak tree a few feet away from the cat.

Looked like the cat was going to try to catch a squirrel.

I shook my head. Sometimes it was good to slow down and pay attention to the little things, but I couldn't pay too much attention, then I'd play a whole scenario in my head that will never happen, and get my hopes up. Better to just let others tell stories.

I reached my apartment and walked up the balcony steps to the second floor, where I set down a bag and got my keys out. Finding the right one, I unlocked my door and entered, remembering to pick the bag back up.

After I put all my groceries away, I checked the time. 3:00. Enough time for a snack. I grabbed the box of oatmeal cream pies, grabbed four, and sat down at my computer. I scrolled through Tumblr, snacking on the self limited snacks until my alarm went off. 5:00

Time to get my game started

I loaded up the gaming chat, where Undyne and Alphys were already there.

"Hey everyone!" I said into my mic. 

"Hey punk." Alphys said. "Our friend is going to be on in a minute."

"That's cool." I said, pulling up the game we were going to play.

"What are we going to play again?" Undyne asked.

"Minecraft." I responded. "It's the game I use to start my gaming friendships. We're going to try to make a little town in survival on a white listed server."

"... What?" Alphys asked.

"Basically we try to survive, fight monsters, grow food as we build a town together and cooperating. It helps me figure out the best games to play with everyone."

"Smart." Undyne said. "Oh, our friend's on."

A familiar profile pic popped up before an even more familiar voice spoke. 

"hey another meme."

"Rex?!" I cried, leaning away from my screen for a sec. "You know Dino Punk and Nerdy Sushi?"

"issat your name for them?"

"Absolutely." I said.

"Wait wait wait. You know Papyrus, punk?" Alphys asked.

"We've been gamer buddies for a few years now." I said. "We recently met up on accident."

I smiled at a giggle from Undyne. "What?"

"Nothing." She said, and the proceeded to mumble something before speaking up. "Where did you meet?"

"at anne operator's work."

"Rolf and Duff's. The best ice cream parlor with custom flavors. Non sponsored."

"It's sponsored if you work there." 

"I guess you're right DP."

“DP?”

"Dino Punk, get used to it."

"you wanna stop talking and join? me and dyne are already started."

"Whoops." I said loading in. "Sorry Rex."

“it’s fine.” he said. “just don’t forget us as you two clown around.”

The next two hours, we worked on creating and maintaining a large town, while Rex collected enough materials to create a statue that apparently Undyne designed. 

“What is this thing again?” I asked as I viewed it from a distance. 

“It’s Mew Mew from Mew Mew Kissy Cutie.”

“What’s that?”

A loud gasp from the Fish Nerd caused me to chuckle. “You don’t know about Mew Mew Kissy Cutie?!”

“It’s an anime punk.” Alphys commented as I heard the smirk in her voice.

“That explains it.” I remarked. “I don’t watch that much anime. The only one I’m mildly into is Pokemon, and that’s just cause I like the games.”

“You need to come to anime night!” Undyne insisted. 

“When is it?” I asked.

“Friday night.” Papyrus comments, finishing up the statue of a pink cat girl. “six o’clock”

“Make sure you bring an anime!” Dino Punk said.

“I have an idea of one, but it’s not a japanese anime though.” I meekly said.

“We can probably watch it.” Undyne said. “If you know it, and call it anime, it should be something to watch.”

“what is it?” Rex asked. 

I smiled. “Do you recognize the quote, ‘There is no war in Ba SIng Se’?”

“Oh ho ho ho!” Alphys said as Undyne chuckled as well. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't really content with the ending, but I kept laughing at the first interactions with Undyne. I would seriously do that.
> 
> I planted a bit of future stuff in this chapter, changing it a tiny bit from cannon me, but it isn't too farfech'd that it would become a problem for me.
> 
> Also I lied. I don't have up to chapter 6. I'm going to rewrite it. I need some dares for the group to do! Don't say anyone specific, just give dares you want anyone to do.

**Author's Note:**

> Come talk to me on Tumblr!
> 
> @IconicAnemone


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